Girl's Day

When I was 17 years old, I strolled down the street in downtown Del Mar, marveling at the adorable boutiques and quaint little cafes. I could taste the salt in the ocean and hear the deep roars that stemmed from a mixture of wind and waves.

I reached the corner of the street. To my left, tanned surfers were either jogging out onto the warm beach or stripping off their wetsuits and gushing over the waves they rode that day. To my right, the scent of freshly-brewed coffee rushed into my soul, invigorating my senses and heightening my awareness of the bustling beauty around me.

I turned towards the cafe but before I could reach for the handle, the door opened. A man, dressed in the so-Cal uniform of a t-shirt, jeans and flip flops, held open the door and paused. I looked up, not noticing his face, but immediately likening his curly brown hair to the locks of Josh Groban. My gaze slowly fluttered from his jaw to his nose and finally settled on his eyes, where I realized that he was looking at me. I froze; he didn't move, either. After a few painfully long moments, he smiled and waved his free arm in the direction of the store, motioning for me to enter.

"Oh my gosh," I thought, "How embarrassing. He was holding the door open for me and I just stood there."

I said thanks and hurried into the cafe, as if the quickening of my strides would somehow make up for those embarrassing seconds. He left the cafe.

I stood in line, trying to decide what to order: It was 3 in the afternoon. Did I really want coffee now? No, I realized, I didn't want coffee right now. Okay then, how about some tea? It was 78 degrees. Why would I want hot tea? Did I want anything cold? No, cause I'd drink it way too fast and then end up shivering and cursing myself for a few minutes. Then what am I doing here?

I left my spot in the line. I walked outside onto the bustling street. I squinted my eyes, trying to adjust to the fiercely bright afternoon sun. I faced the beach and concentrated on the white foamy waves that skated along the baby blue waters. At that moment, while my eyesight was slowly adapting to the sudden change in light, my peripheral vision was nonexistant.

Which explains why I didn't notice that there was somebody standing to the side of me.

Which explains why I didn't really respond right after I heard the words, "Excuse me."

Which explains my genuine surprise and fluster when I realized that the man with the casually torn denim, fitted shirt, curly brown hair and green (or were they brown?) eyes who had moments before, held the door open for me while I pondered over his physical similarity to celebrities, was standing next to me, asking for my attention.

I looked up at him. "Hi."

He smiled. "Hello. My name is Kyle. I see you didn't get any coffee."

I looked at my empty hands. "No, I guess I didn't."

He lifted up his cup-less hands, then put them in his pockets. "I didn't either. I woke up this morning at 5:00, and if I have coffee now, I'll feel like a zombie."

I laughed politely. He laughed, too.

I started to walk towards the corner of the street, intending to push the crosswalk button that would allow me to step one block closer to the beach.

Before I even completed one stride, I heard his voice. "Would you like to go on a walk with me?"

I turned around and looked at him. I ran through the list of things that I needed to do that day: Go home and help my mom cook dinner, pick up my brother from his friend's house, draft that letter for my dad, help my other brother study for his exam, study for my own classes, write up that paper for English Lit, study for the math quiz...

"Sure." I responded, surprising myself. Why did I just say that?

We both turned to face the beach. And we started to walk.

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That walk ended 2 1/2 years later. He was my first love. I was 18 years old. I had never been in love before and never had a serious boyfriend before. He was funny, charming and irresistibly adorable.

The only reason I write this is not because I still have feelings for him but because I realized tonight that even on the very first day, I was already prioritizing my schedule around him.

That night, I was late for dinner. I didn't pick up my brother on time. I ended up drafting the letter later than my dad needed me to and didn't start my homework until hours after my original schedule. But to me, that night was worth it. He had kissed me, near my car, in such a sweet way that it left me weak.

Like I said - he was irresistible to me, then. And continued to be for the next 2.5 years, even when we just simply did not get along anymore.

I can be the first to admit this: I bailed out on a lot of my plans, missed a lot of my friends' various important moments, chose to see him over a good friend on many, many occasions - and that was when things between me and him were going fantastically! When conflicts arose and our relationship took a turn for the worse, my devotion, determination and time invested in the relationship tripled.

I mention this because today, I had the opportunity to hang out with a friend of mine whom I have not seen in over 2 years. She and I were friends in high school, and somehow, after my high school graduation, we completely lost touch. We were eachother's facebook friends, yet never ever talked. Isn't that funny, though? How many of the 200+ friends on facebook are actually your "friends?"

Anyways. It was so nice to see her today and to see the beautiful woman she's developed into. We talked a lot, and I admitted that I had shut out quite a few friends when I was so involved in my relationship. I told her that being single for this past year has been really good for me, as I re-developed my priorities and fell in love again with each person whom I had taken for granted.

It was a really lovely, insightful night. And I want to thank her for being my friend, even after a lapse of 2 years.

Has anyone also gone through the same lesson, where relationships were chosen over loving friends?

So, what did we do today?

After chatting and reminiscing for a little bit, we decided to go and catch a movie. We both decided immediately that we wanted to see He's Just Not That Into You, and oh my gosh, we are both so glad that we did. It's seriously one of the more adorable movies that I've seen in a while. Who knew Justin Long could be so charming and adorable outside of those "I'm a Mac, and I'm a PC" commercials?

We were going to bake cookies, but decided not to today. We're having another girl's date next week, where we'll either be making a batch of cookies or a dozen honey cupcakes. And we're going to go ice skating! Neither of us have ever been - does anyone have any suggestions on how to actually move on the ice for the first time?